Whenever there’s a strange smell in the room, why does everyone automatically assume it’s the fat guy?
Tag Archives: humor
I never was much of a Tweeter but something changed exactly a month back. A Twitter-friend suggested I should Tweet more often so I got my Tweet-on this Ramadan. 140-character limit doesn’t quite cut it for me as I am someone who likes large sentences and elaborate descriptions, so I took this up as a challenge. Sometimes, fewer words make a bigger impact and to demonstrate my Tweet-ability, I present to you my tweets for the last month.
- 21 Jul -
#RamadanRoadRage is in full swing; let’s see how many street fighters I can spot on my way back home.
- 21 Jul -
#BestThingsAboutRamadan - my Non-muslim friends observing fasts just to experience what Muslims go through.
- 3 Aug -
#RamadanFacts: Kissing your daughter doesn’t break your fast, no matter how sweet her cheeks may taste! #Love
- 3 Aug -
#LetYourDaughter ask as many questions as she wants and answer her every time she asks them; it won’t be long before she discovers Google!
- 5 Aug -
#NoteToSelf: Never share hilarious husband-wife #jokes with your #wife esp. if it’s the wife who ends up being the #butt! :p
- 5 Aug - Who says little
#girls aren’t naughty? Damn you, #GenderEquality / #WomensLiberation!
- 7 Aug -
#DonatingBlood for all the wrong reasons; “Are we done, ’cause I could really use a juice box right about now.”
- 7 Aug -
#Twitter = Tutta! My 17-month old #daughter‘s foray into this high-tech world.
- 8 Aug -
#14August is just around the corner; time to renew our patriotic vows and forget them for the rest of the year. #PakistanZindabad
- 8 Aug -
#Ramadan is not just about giving up food and drink for a prescribed amount of time; it’s about moderation, preservation and self-control.
- 9 Aug -
#BeingMarried means having to ALWAYS pickup groceries on the way from the office; no excuses. Just make a weekly list or something, woman!
- 9 Aug -
#PakistanHas the best cuisine in the world. You should give it a try sometime! Get your juices flowing at http://bit.ly/wZMFy3
- 10 Aug - My 17-month old daughter’s brushing my hair; how adorable is that?!
- 11 Aug - Why’s it so easy to take photos but difficult to delete them? Guess I just get emotionally attached to them, not to forget the memories.
- 11 Aug - Sab se pehlay
#Pakistan; unless keh aap ki US, Canadian ya Australian immigration ho jaye.
- 12 Aug - The
#camera is an extension of a #photographer‘s being; you just can’t feel complete without it.
- 13 Aug – Waiting for the final casualty count in Karachi aerial firing; Happy Independence Day folks!
- 14 Aug -
#Karachi: a city with amazing photo opportunities; if only I were brave enough to take my Nikon D7000 without the fear of getting mugged!
- 15 Aug - Wife’s phone ringing in the bedroom; 1.5 yr old daughter brings it to her in the kitchen and says, ‘Mama – Hello – Papa’.
- 16 Aug - Out of sight, out of mind; unless someone regularly pokes you on
- 16 Aug -
#RamadanFacts: You know Eid is upon us when you spot dads waiting outside stores with their bratty kids while moms shop away their savings. #RamadanFacts: Pakistanis still hope to have 29 rozas even after Saudi has declared they’ll have 30. Insha Allah!
If you find some of these remotely interesting/goofy, start following me @YousufBawany.
Spotting a strand of white in a head full of black hair is fairly easy and insignificant, but if you are over thirty, it can be very traumatic. Combine this with the hair-fall situation and the ever-increasing “naked-eye” visibility of your scalp, and viola! Hello, Paranoia.
Depending on (a) how rich (or poor) you are, (b) how bad the present situation really is, or (c) your organic/herbal orientation (straight or otherwise), one of the following will be your next course of action:
- Pretend everything is OK and do nothing; after all, you still have a lot more hair compared to cousin Salman (and I really mean A LOT).
- Try black henna (kaali mehndi) to cover up those grays, or hair-dye; stay 21 for the rest of your life. Then again, some choose to go all out with the regular henna, turning their hair (and sometimes beard too) a weird shade of orange (a definite no-no!).
- Rush to the supermarket and grab a variety of shampoos claiming to give you super-strong hair (photoshopped?) and/or decrease hair-fall (like that ever works!); if everything fails, you can find solace in cursing the likes of Katrina Kaif and Shahid Afridi for misleading you.
- Get a wig; there is no better time than the present to reinvent yourself with a new look.
- Sign up for the latest herbal fads and a promise to turn back your biological clock; it’s either ‘go organic’ or ‘go bald’.
- Enter the highly overdecorated foyer of the hair transplant clinic and ask for the best plugs/grafts money can buy; you’ve always wished the hair on your head was as thick and lustrous as that on other parts of your body (or as Harry Potter would call ‘em, ‘parts-that-shall-not-be-named’) – dreams do come true.
It’s no wonder hair-care is a multi-billion dollar industry that fools people into thinking they can have model-gorgeous hair within the confines of their homes, a misconception most of us fall for. Thousands of cosmetics companies and research facilities spend an exorbitant amount of money trying to create the ultimate serum, the magic element that will eventually cure all hair-related ills. Like in any flourishing industry, a bunch of hair-care companies run cons and play on people’s psychological state to rob them off of every penny. Unfortunately, I have met and heard stories of many people going totally bald or platinum because of such products. Even after knowing and hearing about such horrific accidents, we find ourselves lunging towards every new product that tugs at the strings of our heart. “I can feel it in my bones; this one will work. After all, it’s being endorsed by Little Miss Perfect“. Everyone knows deep down inside that (most) celebrities will do anything to earn some extra on the side (surprisingly, there are still a handful of celebrities with their integrity intact).
Ever wondered why we fall for these scams the way we do, time and time again? Some people call it a mid-life crisis (with an average lifespan of 65 years, it seems just about right), others call it going over the hill, but try as you might, you are not getting any younger; the sooner you realize this, the better. We lunge at every (affordable) opportunity to get back our lost years, turn back time, be Benjamin Button; then again, he did die eventually. Some of us spend so much time in these self-obsessions that we neglect our loved ones, often hurting their feelings in the process. Time keeps fleeting by, yet we keep searching for that ultimate high, letting little moments of happiness go right in front of our eyes (I like the way this sentence rhymes).
I am what you might call an opti-realist; I hope for the best, knowing what realities I have to face. We should all keep in mind that we are not here forever; the clock’s a-tickin’ and we should make every moment worthwhile, no matter how insignificant it may seem. Forget about the hair fall and the anti-aging creams, embrace your wrinkles, flaunt your baldness, and be happy with what you have; one look around and you’ll spot thousands who don’t have even a tenth of what you have.
Be thankful. Don’t just exist; LIVE!
I wonder why, but every time I pick a piece of paper, I hear someone shriek, begging me to go-no-further. “If you make one more fold, I’ll shoot you”, says my mum. Reflecting on this reaction people have, I think maybe it’s because once I get to folding, I lose all sense of time and space for hours, even days (depending on how complicated the model I’m working on is) at a stretch. A more profound understanding of this peculiar behavior hit me later, in a rare moment of clarity in my otherwise insane existence; people really do not understand how satisfying and soothing Origami can be.
These methodical series of folds require focus and attention, and have a strangely calming affect on your nerves. Life seems to slow down a bit as you tread down the valleys and mountains (refer to the folding techniques), taking each step carefully, holding on, knowing one false move will lead you astray. I have been practicing origami for more than 10 years now, but I still think of myself as an amateur.
These days, I get less and less time to retreat into Origami’s soothing embrace. The one consolation I have is that my wife appreciates creativity and is eager to learn this age-old art-form; one eager student is better than none. In this post, I present some of the models that I have created over the years. Lately, I haven’t created anything new but I intend to change that soon, thanks to my one-woman fan-club.
Interestingly, these photos were taken at an outdoor birthday party (1st birthday, to be precise). I ended up taking photos of everything but the birthday boy himself. A fun-filled day spent with family and friends, it sure was a one-of-a-kind birthday. Moreover, it was a good day for getting close to nature.
Here’s what I ended up with. Enjoy!